Keep notes minimal by deciding one question before you start, recording only a few public, non-sensitive details tied to that question, storing them privately on your own device, and setting a deletion date now. Avoid a dossier, sensitive photo archives, or a searchable file of accusations. The goal is a clear decision of your own about whether to continue contact, not a growing record about another person.
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Start with a single purpose, not a file
Before looking at a profile, write one sentence naming the question you want answered, such as whether shared interests and stated intentions line up enough to continue a conversation. That purpose sets the boundary: if a detail does not help answer it, leave it out. The eSafety Commissioner advises reviewing privacy, contact, location, reporting, and verification controls before choosing a dating app. The same discipline applies to your own note-taking: decide what the note should do before you collect anything. A purpose written first is what keeps an honest note from becoming an accumulating file about a person. [eSafety Commissioner: Online dating]
- Write your one-question purpose in the same note before collecting anything
- Reread it whenever you are tempted to add a new field
A small suggested field list
As an editorial suggestion, a minimal note can have four fields: your purpose, the public profile detail you saw, the date you saw it, and your next step. This is one workable shape, not a rule, and you can adapt it to your own question. Resist adding fields for feelings, guesses about intent, or speculation about who someone really is. If a detail only makes sense as part of a growing biography of the person, it does not belong in the note. Keep the note focused on your own decision, not on building a case.
What not to keep
The eSafety Commissioner notes that reused photos or linked social accounts can reveal more than you intend, because the same visibility works in both directions. As editorial suggestions rather than rules, do not save screenshots of sensitive photos, identity documents, family members, workplaces, or locations, and do not build a searchable file of public accusations. Keep identifying detail low. Listing private contact details in your notes turns a small check into a risk. [eSafety Commissioner: Online dating]
Watch for phishing while you write
Separately, watch for phishing patterns in the messages you review. The FTC says phishing messages try to obtain sensitive account or financial information. As an editorial suggestion, note the request itself only in general terms, and never record codes, passwords, or account details in your file. A request for such information is a pattern to handle plainly, not a puzzle to solve inside your notes. [FTC: How To Recognize and Avoid Phishing Scams]
A worked example, clearly hypothetical
Imagine a hypothetical dater who wants to know whether a match's stated interests line up with her own. She writes the purpose first, records a couple of public, non-identifying details she saw, the date, and a next step: ask one open question in the app. She does not save photos, does not search the username on other sites, and does not note guesses about the person's character. After a conversation or two, she rereads the note, checks whether it still serves her own question, and keeps or discards it without treating it as proof of anything. This is an editorial illustration, not a real case, and it shows the shape of a small note rather than a way to judge anyone.
Store it privately and briefly
As an editorial suggestion, choose one private place and one format, such as a locked note on your own device, and keep nothing in shared drives, group chats, or public posts. Do not publish notes about another person or forward them to friends as evidence. Your notes are for your own decision-making. Protecting the account that holds them matters too: the FTC notes that multi-factor authentication adds account protection, which is worth enabling on the account or device where you keep the note. [FTC: How To Recognize and Avoid Phishing Scams]
Decision table for adding or keeping a line
Use this table, an editorial suggestion rather than a formal test or risk score, before you add a line and again when you review the file. It separates what you observed, the limit that applies, and the action you take.
| Observation | Limit | Action |
|---|---|---|
| Public statement of intentions | Only keep what directly answers your one question | Note it briefly, with the date |
| Sensitive photo or identifying detail | Do not build an image or identity archive | Skip it; do not screenshot |
| Message requesting account details or financial information | Not something to store or solve in your notes; editorial suggestion: treat as a phishing pattern | Do not send or record codes or account data; stop engaging on that channel and verify through the provider's independently known website or phone number |
| Speculation about intent from a handle | Guesswork is not an observation (editorial suggestion) | Leave it out |
| A public profile page link | Optional, non-sensitive only, and only if you will reread it (editorial suggestion) | Record it only if it answers your question, next to your deletion date |
Stopping rule and next action
Set the deletion rule before you start. As an editorial suggestion, you might pick a short period, such as a week, and if the note has not helped you decide by then, delete it and act on what you already know. The eSafety Commissioner makes clear that you may decline contact or a meeting that makes you uncomfortable; that choice needs no file to justify it. If a message looks like a phishing attempt, the FTC advises contacting the provider through its independently known website or phone number rather than through a link in the message. The FTC also notes that multi-factor authentication adds account protection. [eSafety Commissioner: Online dating] [FTC: How To Recognize and Avoid Phishing Scams]
A couple more questions
How many fields should a profile-check note have?
There is no standard. As an editorial suggestion, four is a workable shape: purpose, the public detail you saw, the date, and your next step. Add a field only if it directly answers your one question.
Can I keep screenshots of a profile?
As an editorial suggestion, prefer not. Screenshots of sensitive photos or identifying details turn a short note into an archive. If you need a reminder, note a non-sensitive public page and your question instead, and never save sensitive images or identifying details.
What should I do if a match asks for account details or codes?
Do not send them and do not record codes or passwords in your file. The FTC advises contacting the provider through its independently known website or phone number rather than through a link in a suspicious message, and enabling multi-factor authentication for account protection.
When should I delete the note?
Set a date when you create it; a short period such as a week is one editorial suggestion, not a standard. If the note has not helped you decide by then, delete it and act on the information you already have.
Sources & editorial notes
Official references checked on October 20, 2026. Checklists, comparison tables and example wording are DateClues editorial tools, not official tests or validated risk scores.
General information. No guide or tool can certify a person’s identity, intentions or safety. Read our editorial standards.